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Zoomies Wearable Binoculars

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Formerly AngryMcPisseron

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    Posted: 28 Feb 2013 at 12:35am
    ZOOMIES™ WEARABLE BINOCULARS

    Zoomies™ Wearable Binoculars, retail $10.00* (https://www.buyzoomies.com
    Manufactured by (Unknown)
    Last updated 02-28-13 




    This product does not emit light and isn't an R/C vehicle or test instrument, so my standard review format will not be used and the Zoomies™ will not be assigned a rating. 

    Zoomies™ are a type of binoculars that you use like eyeglasses; they are touted to bring high-power magnification in a lightweight, cost-effective design -- $10 for Zoomies™ vs. $200+ for regular binocs. 


    * The $10.00 price netted me two pairs of Zoomies™ Wearable Binoculars, even though I had ordered just one. 


     Size of product w/hand to show scale SIZE 


    The Zoomies™ are fairly straightforward to use; just put them on as you would a pair of sunglasses, and adjust the focus with the knobs positioned near the hinge of each temple (the rod-like component of eyeglasses & sunglasses that extend from the lenses to go over your ears). 

    An inbuilt sun filter can be deployed if necessary; on the inside of the Zoomies™ above the lens that goes to you right eye, there's a not-so-obvious slider. Slide it in toward the center of the product to bring brownish-colored filtered lenses (replacing the colorless lenses) into use; slide it the other way to bring the colorless lenses back. 



    Zoomies™ Wearable Binoculars being used.
    God I look like a dork with these things on!!! 



    Control photograph (no Zoomies™ Wearable Binoculars). 



    Zoomies™ in front of the camera's lens for the same pic. at the same distance. 

    Does that look like 3x (300%) magnification to you? 

    In the control photograph, the peace sign directly in front of Nikki's tail measures 15mm on my monitor; the Zoomies™ photograph shows the same peace sign measures 36mm on the same monitor. 

    This equates to a mag factor
    * of approx. 2.1x (210%). 





    TEST NOTES:
    Test unit was purchased on 01-15-13, and was received on the afternoon of 02-26-13.
    Actually, they sent two pairs instead of the one pair that I had ordered.
    A receipt was not found in the packaging materials 

    * This link leads to a download of the Commodore 64 computer demo named, "Mag Factor Three" that I wrote in late-1992; you may run it on your pee-cee with WinVice v1.19


    UPDATE: 00-00-00



    PROS:
    They look like they could be incorporated into some kind of robot/cyborg type Halloween costume (courtesy of Jimbo on this BBS


    NEUTRAL:
    They make you look kinda "dorky" when worn 


    CONS:
    The claim of "300% magnification" is a big load of horse puckey!!! Looks closer to 210%.
    300% is not all that much anyway -- the TV commercial calls these, "high-powered". 
    Both knobs must be turned simultaneously or else the focusing mechanism will jam up 


      MANUFACTURER: Unknown 
      PRODUCT TYPE: Wearable binoculars 
      LAMP TYPE: N/A 
      No. OF LAMPS: N/A 
      BEAM TYPE: N/A 
      SWITCH TYPE: N/A 
      CASE MATERIAL: Plastic 
      BEZEL: N/A 
      BATTERY: N/A 
      CURRENT CONSUMPTION: N/A 
      WATER- AND URANATION-RESISTANT: Light splatter-resistance at maximum 
      SUBMERSIBLE: ¡¡¡EL CONEJITO DE PASCUA QUE SE CEPILLA LOS DIENTES CON UN CEPILLO DE DIENTES QUE CAYÓ EN EL HIGIÉNICO, NO!!!  
      ACCESSORIES: 2x neck lanyards, 2x velvet-like drawstring pouches 
      SIZE: 163mm W x 147mm L x 44mm T 
      WEIGHT: 57.40g (2.030 oz.) 
      COUNTRY OF MANUFACTURE: Unknown 
      WARRANTY: 30 days 

      PRODUCT RATING:

      (Product is not a light-emitter, R/C vehicle, or test
      instrument, so a "star" rating will not be furnished.
       

      However, if they were a light, they'd "earn" the prestigious {cough, sputter, sound of a toilet flushing} "0 STARS! PISS ON IT!" rating!!!
      )
       

      My recommendation is a big steaming load of "DO NOT BUY!!!"

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jimbo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Feb 2013 at 12:45am
On the positive side, they look like they could be incorporated into some kind of robot/cyborg type Halloween costume!!! Thumbs Up
 
(Also, when I read the thread title, I thought it said "Zombies" LOL)
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Thor Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Feb 2013 at 2:08am
Originally posted by Jimbo Jimbo wrote:

 
(Also, when I read the thread title, I thought it said "Zombies" LOL)
 
 
 
Same here.
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Papa Lazarou Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Feb 2013 at 2:11am
Yet again, zombies...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Snesgamer Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Feb 2013 at 6:05am
God damnit you guys, I was going to post about the zombie similarity.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jimbo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Feb 2013 at 6:22am
You did, you did!!!!
 
We just did it first!!!!! LOL
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Tampon Submarine Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 28 Feb 2013 at 2:52pm
Originally posted by Jimbo Jimbo wrote:

On the positive side, they look like they could be incorporated into some kind of robot/cyborg type Halloween costume!!! Thumbs Up
 
You know, I may just add that to the "PROS" field!!! LOLThumbs UpLOL

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote regulus Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 Apr 2013 at 9:22pm
Nothing more than a pair of Galilean Telescopes mounted in cheap china plastic. 3x, that's it. What a Gyp!Dead
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ad nauseous Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 Apr 2013 at 9:46pm
Originally posted by Thor Thor wrote:

Originally posted by Jimbo Jimbo wrote:


 

(Also, when I read the thread title, I thought it said "Zombies" LOL)

 

 




 

Same here.

 

 


You beat me to it!
One good thing about TV-you could always turn it off
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote PaWolf Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 06 Apr 2013 at 9:56pm
I never even thought of 'Zombies', being one to always think 'on the good side'.
ConfusedThese things don't look like they'd even help a decent 'peeping tom' get a better view.
What a waste.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Tampon Submarine Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 Apr 2013 at 1:24am
They really are a PWPOSMF (Pussywhipped Piece of Shiit MotherFukker) and really did "earn" {cough, sputter, sound of a toilet flushing} the rather emphatic, "DO NOT BUY" rating from me. CryDeadAngryDeadCry
Absolutely, positively, the worst sixteen bucks I've ever flushed away. Ouch

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote PaWolf Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 Apr 2013 at 1:37am
Originally posted by Tampon Submarine Tampon Submarine wrote:


    Control photograph (no Zoomies™ Wearable Binoculars). 



ConfusedShockedLOL
Ang...seriously!
You look DANGEROUS, above.LOL I love it! TOO funny!
If I were the 'Cat Police', I'd arrest you for being a deviant who looks in on cats during 'personal cleaning time', without permission. If only she knew what you were up to...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jimbo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 Apr 2013 at 2:30am
Originally posted by Tampon Submarine Tampon Submarine wrote:

They really are a PWPOSMF (Pussywhipped Piece of Shiit MotherFukker) and really did "earn" {cough, sputter, sound of a toilet flushing} the rather emphatic, "DO NOT BUY" rating from me. CryDeadAngryDeadCry
Absolutely, positively, the worst sixteen bucks I've ever flushed away. Ouch
 
Just don't forget about them come this Halloween when you're putting together a costume!!!
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Thor Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 Apr 2013 at 2:27pm
 
The fact that this product costs only $10 would've probably told me that it's about as good as a pair of those X-ray Specs they used to advertise in comic books.
 
 
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jimbo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 Apr 2013 at 4:50pm
God, how I wanted a pair of those things.
 
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Thor Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 Apr 2013 at 4:59pm
 
Who didn't?
 
Funny how all the writing for that ad states that the thing isn't real ("optical illusion", "seems to be able to...")---yet we all believed that we'd really be able to see through girls' clothes.
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Jimbo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 Apr 2013 at 5:52pm
We believed it because we wanted to so badly.
 
Even now as grown "adult" men, if somebody developed a product that would actually allow us to really do that, we'd be buying it in droves.
 
I remember a story a few years ago about a particular Sony video camera that had a night vision setting that actually allowed the user to see various outlines on a person's body thru their clothing.
 
 
AAMOF, there are devices out there now that utilize infra red light to allow digital cameras to "see thru" clothing.
 
 
Google x-ray camera or video camera x-ray vision, etc., & you'll see a lot of stuff about it.
 
There are instructional videos on YouTube on how to make them as well.
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote regulus Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 07 Apr 2013 at 6:29pm
Originally posted by Jimbo Jimbo wrote:

God, how I wanted a pair of those things.
 
 
I saw one of those once at a Garage Sale, a Pair of Cardboard Specs with a pinhole, inside of which was a feather.
 
Hey Mom! Check this out, this Church has footrests in their pews!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Zissy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 02 May 2013 at 8:52am
I'm happy that I read this now I won't waste my money. I was going to get them to use when doing crafts. ;P
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote phlipper Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 May 2013 at 1:32am
I must confess, knowing quite a bit about optics, I knew what I was getting into. I ordered them for the "dork" factor. I, too, was surprised at getting 2 pairs. It's my birthday today and my girlfriend's is next week. She'll be so surprised at her gift!
Yes, Zoomies are a total piece of c#^p. But, for the small price, it will be totally worth the laughs. My hat's off to the Zoomie folks for pulling off this delightful fraud.


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote sgtrock21 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 29 Jun 2013 at 10:37pm
I was just now assaulted by the zoomies commercial. I feel sad that consumers can be convinced to purchase this crap.
EEEEts All so REEEdEEEculous
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote PaWolf Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 30 Jun 2013 at 12:02am
Originally posted by sgtrock21 sgtrock21 wrote:

I was just now assaulted by the zoomies commercial. I feel sad that consumers can be convinced to purchase this crap.
LOL...just wait, Sarge. When you REALLY want to panic is the day you go in for that next 'exam' and your proctologist is wearing a pair and lookin' an awful lot like someone we all know and love (but not in the 'biblical sense')...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ad nauseous Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 30 Jun 2013 at 10:48pm


Here's the commercial cheesy as ****!
One good thing about TV-you could always turn it off
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ad Endless Nauseum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12 Aug 2013 at 2:52am
As a few folks seem to have been suckered already, I'll just pass on this sincere warning: DO NOT USE THE "SUN" FILTERS FOR ANYTHING. Certainly NOT for observing the Sun!!!       

I've been an amateur astronomer for than 30 years, and can tell you absolutely that those "filters" will fail, exposing your eyes to the full sunlight. With a magnifying lens focusing the Sun onto your eyes, like a little kid using a glass to burn ants and other bugs.

I'm sure that most of those ambulance chasing liars (oops, I mean Lawyers) on those other TV ads we hate are just figgeting in their chairs with impatience to sue the maker for all kinds of things.

Rather than wasting your ten bucks, send me the money! Or burn it. Best yet, donate it to help maintain this web forum!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote DKS Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 12 Aug 2013 at 11:53am
I saw this post 3 times before I realized it said "Zoomies" and not "Zombies".
"I see the sadness in their eyes
Melancholy in their cries
Devoid of all the passion
The human spirit cannot die"
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