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Starbucks Blonde Roast Story w/ Lindsey

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Cat Box View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Cat Box Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Topic: Starbucks Blonde Roast Story w/ Lindsey
    Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 2:05am
I have no problem with the person other than her(?) general ambiguity, and that's just a personal quibble.

The thing that really boils my pee is the fact she is so goddamn happy being a barista at Starbucks. The way she carries on it seems like it was her goal in life to work behind the counter at a lousy Starbucks. She either has the best customers on earth all day long every day(highly unlikely) or she is stoned to the gills on something.


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Thor View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Thor Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 2:25am
Originally posted by Cat Box Cat Box wrote:



The thing that really boils my pee is the fact she is so goddamn happy being a barista at Starbucks. The way she carries on it seems like it was her goal in life to work behind the counter at a lousy Starbucks. She either has the best customers on earth all day long every day(highly unlikely) or she is stoned to the gills on something.

 
Hmmmm...oddly, that'd make her like the "Have a super sparkly day" girl. 
 
 
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (1) Thanks(1)   Quote Brad Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 2:48am

I was going to post about this crap, but you beat me to it.  I see the whole campaign as "Our coffee really sucked because it was burnt, acidic, and overroasted, but we pussified it for you people who don't like 'real' coffee"  

Eff it, I'm going to Wawa!

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote EMCEE Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 3:38am
Originally posted by Cat Box Cat Box wrote:



The thing that really boils my pee...



Speaking of which, that coffee looks like boiled piss.  "Blonde Piss Roast," if you will (it's got a light, pissy flavor).  And yes, Ms. Ambiguously Gay is WAAAY too happy to be working at a Starbucks, especially if she's getting off by serving her customers "Blonde Piss Roast" coffee.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Madawee Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 3:16pm
^ That line cracked me up "boil my pee"!
 
Welcome, Cat Box and Brad!
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insanity213 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote insanity213 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 3:23pm
^^ That and "stoned to the gills" LOL  That one especially is great because she does look pretty baked in the video's stillshot.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Madawee Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 3:37pm
Originally posted by insanity213 insanity213 wrote:

^^ That and "stoned to the gillsLOL  That one especially is great because she does look pretty baked in the video's stillshot.

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Yes! Very funny.
 
OK, I'm going to go out here on a politically incorrect limb but...
 
not so sure she's stoned to the gills - she kinda looks more like:
 
A few sandwiches short of a picnic. 
 
The light's on but nobody's home.
 
The elevator didn't make it to the top floor.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote insanity213 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 4:58pm
^^ LOL

A few donuts short of a dozen.


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Snesgamer Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 5:16pm
I generally try not to judge by appearances, but my God - they sure went out of their way to find the most androgynous person they could find, didn't they?

100% guaranteed lesbo, is all I have to say.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Madawee Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 6:15pm
You have to wonder... is it Lindsey as in Lindsey Lohan or Lindsey as in Lindsey Buckingham?
 
I bet "Lindsey"  has a sibling  named "Pat."
 
I still say:
 
the cheese fell off the cracker.
 
Lives out where the buses don't run
 
A few fries short of a Happy meal...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote EMCEE Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 6:22pm

A few grounds short of a good cup of coffee.

One stop short of a bus ride. 
 
One stroke short of an orgasm.
 
Someone's taken her marbles away.
 
Some mice have gotten into her grain stores.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote insanity213 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 6:23pm
She has signs by each ear saying "Space for Rent."

She fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down.

For all we know though she may have the mind of a mousetrap .. but if she does then she ought to let some of those mice go.


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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote PaWolf Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 7:52pm
Originally posted by EMCEE EMCEE wrote:

Originally posted by Cat Box Cat Box wrote:



The thing that really boils my pee...



Speaking of which, that coffee looks like boiled piss.  "Blonde Piss Roast," if you will (it's got a light, pissy flavor).  And yes, Ms. Ambiguously Gay is WAAAY too happy to be working at a Starbucks, especially if she's getting off by serving her customers "Blonde Piss Roast" coffee.
CryThanks tons -  now I have a scalded uretha after expelling 'boiling pee' (my bladder reacts to suggestion now and then - heated up the ol'juices on it's own and just about cooked me from the inside, not unlike an Oscar Meyer hot dog in a microwave, doncha knowConfused...).   
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote EMCEE Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 8:17pm
Originally posted by PaWolf PaWolf wrote:

Originally posted by EMCEE EMCEE wrote:

Originally posted by Cat Box Cat Box wrote:



The thing that really boils my pee...



Speaking of which, that coffee looks like boiled piss.  "Blonde Piss Roast," if you will (it's got a light, pissy flavor).  And yes, Ms. Ambiguously Gay is WAAAY too happy to be working at a Starbucks, especially if she's getting off by serving her customers "Blonde Piss Roast" coffee.
CryThanks tons -  now I have a scalded uretha after expelling 'boiling pee' (my bladder reacts to suggestion now and then - heated up the ol'juices on it's own and just about cooked me from the inside, not unlike an Oscar Meyer hot dog in a microwave, doncha knowConfused...).   
You could stand behind the counter as a "Blonde Piss Roast" dispenser at Starbucks!  You are a Piss Roast Percolator!  LOL
Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote strifeknot Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 8:58pm
Roasts like this are for wusses. You might as well just drink a hot glass of water.

There's nothing special about Starbucks traditional roast, but at least it's not piss water.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Ad nauseous Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 10:03pm
WackoOMG is she serious? Who is that interested in coffee? WTF?Confused
 
 
One good thing about TV-you could always turn it off
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote JasperGretsch Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Feb 2013 at 1:29am
They have another commercial with a guy talking about his mother "My son made me this coffee, it's delicious!" 

Now, I have no problem if you're gay, but I had an observation: The guy in that commercial sounds like he could be, and the girl in the above commercial looks like she could be. Is it possible that Starbucks is pushing subconscious pro gay/lesbian support? Not that there's anything wrong with that...
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Thor Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Feb 2013 at 1:47am
Originally posted by JasperGretsch JasperGretsch wrote:


Now, I have no problem if you're gay, but I had an observation: The guy in that commercial sounds like he could be, and the girl in the above commercial looks like she could be. Is it possible that Starbucks is pushing subconscious pro gay/lesbian support? Not that there's anything wrong with that...
 
I guess you'd then have to ask the question "Are all the companies that never have any gays/lesbians in their commercials, pushing subconscious pro-straight support?".
 
 
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Hawkeye721 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 03 Feb 2013 at 4:55am
Why is she sad when other people dont like it anyway? Its not like she invented cofee.
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