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MrTim
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Plane headed to convention with 84 Norwegian plumbers aboard forced to land due to problem toilet; Plumbers offered to fix it, but airline refused because it "couldn't a'fjord their hourly rate"
http://metro.co.uk/2018/02/01/plane-84-plumbers-board-forced-land-toilet-problem-7279098/ |
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MrTim
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Archeologists find proof of Vikings in Minnesota; Football team claims they "weren't hiding" at all
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MrTim
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Google/FaceBook announce new HR policy: "You can only ask a coworker out once; After that, it's considered sexual harassment"; Under new rules, women discover playing hard to get is a sure fire way to end up a cat lady
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MrTim
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Business adage "Location, location, location" proves itself once again: Girl Scout knows her customers, sells 300 boxes of cookies in one place
https://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2018/02/07/Girl-Scout-sells-300-boxes-of-cookies-outside-marijuana-store/8131518016889/?utm_source=sec&utm_campaign=sl&utm_medium=10 |
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MrTim
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Things About Valentine's Day You Didn't Know: India celebrates Children's Day on November 14th , exactly 9 months after Valentine's Day
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MrTim
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Alexa is watching: Couples getting intimate think they're alone, but they aren't; Attempts to get Alexa to replay the previous goings on seldom work, though it is recorded somewhere
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MrTim
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Lion poacher ends up as dinner for his hunted prey; Gun, ammo, untouched cat treats found near his remains
https://boingboing.net/2018/02/12/lions-ate-suspected-poacher.html |
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DarkRealmStar
Junior Executive Joined: 30 Jul 2013 Location: Undisclosed Status: Offline Points: 3181 |
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MrTim
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People now proudly showing off their best side when mooning; Butt facials gaining in popularity, even improving personal hygiene as a result
https://wsrz.iheart.com/content/2018-02-13-butt-facials-are-now-a-thing-offered-at-spas/?ICID=ref_fark |
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MrTim
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Olympic Committee to give "Participation Medallions" to Winter Games athletes & staff; All to receive Olympics-brand condom necklaces, thereby also getting rid of massive overstock
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MrTim
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Mother makes panicked scene at mall; Her children slip away in gathering crowd, denying even knowing her
https://www.theepochtimes.com/mom-screams-for-help-as-she-cant-free-herself-from-a-ball-pit-in-a-mall_2435310.html?utm_source=fark&utm_medium=website&utm_content=link&ICID=ref_fark |
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MrTim
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New dog park etiquette spreading from West Coast: When dog owners meet, it's considered a polite greeting for both parties to sniff each other's (and their dog's) butts; Miss Manners opines "Oh, Hell No!"
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MrTim
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NBC Winter Olympics ratings continue to stink on ice; People switching to the channel that has the burning fireplace log instead because "it has more action and even less talking"
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MrTim
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Tourists frolic over Blue whale carcass, take selfies; Party later moved to park for flattened "roadkill frisbee" competition, chili eating contest
http://www.foxnews.com/science/2018/02/21/blue-whale-carcass-carved-into-stomped-on-by-tourists-taking-selfies-on-top-creature.html |
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MrTim
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"The Force is Female": Star Wars 9 to follow in path of groundbreaking Ghostbusters reboot; Though cast will be predominately female, they won't be able to save lame storyline
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MrTim
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Prison Rumor Edition:
Subway Jared gains 230 pounds in prison, mostly on his backside; Blames new cellmate |
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MrTim
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Grandparents being told not to expect Thank You notes from grand-spawn anymore; Kids using computers so often that they can't even hold pens or pencils correctly, much less write with them
https://www.sciencealert.com/are-you-holding-pen-correctly-children-struggle-technology-dysgraphia |
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MrTim
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Barbra Streisand has 2 clones made of her deceased pet dog, wills all of her money to them; Will stipulates that the dogs are to have Streisand cloned as well
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MrTim
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Jimmy Kimmel wins an Oscar for hosting; Comic obviously wasn't funny, but acted like he was
This Just In! Broadcasting standards slip to new low: George Carlin's "7 Things You Can't Say On Television" can now be said ...on television! |
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MrTim
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Celebrities' housebreaking training pays off; No reported 'accidents' on this year's Oscars red carpet walk
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MrTim
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McDonald's restaurant celebrates International Woman's Day by flipping Golden Arches upside down; Unfortunately, the intended 'W' looked more like a pair of sagging boobs
https://pjmedia.com/lifestyle/mcdonalds-supports-women-with-a-big-wac/ |
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MrTim
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Move over, cyclists; Growing trend around country to convert bike lanes on roadways to "Wheelchair Only" lanes
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MrTim
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Shocking cemetery secrets revealed: Half of all coffins dug up show evidence of scratch marks on the inside of the lid; PR firms in quandry on whether to try and blame it on zombies, or not
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MrTim
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Start that Christmas shopping early with these two trendy gifts! The Taco Toaster and the smartphone-programmable Lettuce Baster are the newest must-have gadgets for the kitchen!
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MrTim
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Enclosed phone booths making a comeback due to insecure people needing a 'safe space'; However, you need to supply your own phone; Also, beware of booths without visible ventilation
https://www.nytimes.com/2018/03/10/business/office-privacy-phone-booth.html |
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