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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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CPSC may announce massive recall of wooden sex toys; Action due to "a dangerous possibility of splinters"
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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TSA detains man at San Francisco airport for having a suspiciously large penis; Agents were aroused by fears he was "trying to smuggle a large package in his pants" aboard airplane |
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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Text walking lanes installed in Belgium; Gum chewing not allowed at same time, however
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MrTim
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LeBron James inadvertently flashes ABC viewers; "You needed to have a really good DVR and microscope to see it" said Tim Winter, president of PTC; James responds "That's just being insulting"
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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Mick Jagger & Steven Tyler to Caitlyn Jenner: "Please stop impersonating us"
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MrTim
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Study: Viewing cat videos boosts energy and positive emotions; However, cleaning litter boxes every day slowly kills you inside
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MrTim
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Uber bans guns carried by it's drivers and passengers; Business drops drastically overnight in Chicago, several foreign countries
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MrTim
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FDA rules that "hair amputation" is a medical procedure; Barbers and beauticians must now obtain medical degrees to practice their trade
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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The Trend Continues: Americans once again buy more hot dogs than fireworks for 4th of July celebrations
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MrTim
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Government study reveals worst place to have sex in the house: Sex on top of the stove "not a good idea"
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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Top Fashion Scent of the Year revealed: Hot Popcorn fragrance popular with both perfumes and colognes
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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ABC's The Bachelorette to drop hunks, merge with Once Upon A Time; Hopeful contestant must now find her one true love by kissing frogs
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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Vegans debating whether to make salt taboo; "Salt is too much like a meat taste" says one faction
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Papa Lazarou
Ad Exec Formerly Codtaro Joined: 18 Nov 2011 Location: New Mexico Status: Offline Points: 7710 |
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they shouldn't use the "Salt Pink Himalayan No Chemicals Non-gmo Organic Halall Kosher Fine Grind" it has DNA!
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Banana!
BANANA!! BANANA!!! BANANA!! Banana! |
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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City of Seattle seeking large fines, jail time for man who didn't clean up after his chihuahua while walking it; Judge throws out case, citing "the pile of alleged poo was larger than the dog!"
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i8acannibal
Junior Executive Joined: 19 Jun 2014 Location: New Hampshire Status: Offline Points: 3497 |
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MrTim, you never cease to amaze.
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Say something clever here...
No, I'm too lazy. Imagine it yourself. |
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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People may need to reconsider eating raw vegetables; Doctors report they are increasingly finding "small forests of broccoli growing" while doing colonoscopies
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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Cost of flying going up again: Airlines to start charging $10 fee for airsickness bags; However, the rumors that airliners must also be equipped with stomach pumps are false
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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Lesbians and Feminists upset over a book being touted as a "seminal history" of their movements; Authors going into hiding
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MrTim
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Police say the hitchhiking robot, HitchBOT, was sexually assaulted by other machines before being decapitated; Parts of a toaster, a Harley motorcycle, and a vacuum cleaner were found at crime scene |
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MrTim
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Texas man claims drunken armadillo took his gun and shot him in face; Armadillo confirms "Yep, except for the 'drunk' part, that's exactly how it happened"
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MrTim
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Study finds that gay teens get pregnant more than teen straights do; Reasons may be poor sex education, doing it wrong, or unclear on the concept |
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MrTim
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More protests in Ferguson tonight; Also, Britain being invaded by fleas with giant penises http://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/595686/Calais-migrant-giant-penis-flea |
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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Group of architects announce indiegogo campaign to build life-size replica of The Lord of the Rings city Minas Tirith; Orcs launch their own crowdfunding campaign to raise funds to beseige it https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/realise-minas-tirith#/story http://www.telegraph.co.uk/film/lord-of-the-rings/orcs-launch-crowdfunding-campaign-to-destroy-minas-tirith/ (Believe me, people, I couldn't come up with this if I tried. ) |
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MrTim
Ad Exec Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Status: Offline Points: 10421 |
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NYU scientists discover virus in local drinking water responsible for New Yorkers' anti-social behavior; Head researcher says "There is no cure, so get out of my face you stinking leeches!"
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