Starbucks Blonde Roast Story w/ Lindsey |
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Cat Box
Commercial Hater Joined: 19 Feb 2012 Location: Outer Space Status: Offline Points: 43 |
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Posted: 01 Feb 2013 at 2:05am |
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I have no problem with the person other than her(?) general ambiguity, and that's just a personal quibble.
The thing that really boils my pee is the fact she is so goddamn happy being a barista at Starbucks. The way she carries on it seems like it was her goal in life to work behind the counter at a lousy Starbucks. She either has the best customers on earth all day long every day(highly unlikely) or she is stoned to the gills on something. |
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Thor
Revolutionary Joined: 16 Apr 2008 Location: Rockaway, NJ Status: Offline Points: 63906 |
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Hmmmm...oddly, that'd make her like the "Have a super sparkly day" girl.
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Brad
Junior Executive Joined: 28 Feb 2012 Location: AZ Status: Offline Points: 62 |
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I was going to post about this crap, but you beat me to it. I see the whole campaign as "Our coffee really sucked because it was burnt, acidic, and overroasted, but we pussified it for you people who don't like 'real' coffee" Eff it, I'm going to Wawa! |
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EMCEE
Junior Executive Joined: 07 Feb 2010 Location: IL Status: Offline Points: 2731 |
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Speaking of which, that coffee looks like boiled piss. "Blonde Piss Roast," if you will (it's got a light, pissy flavor). And yes, Ms. Ambiguously Gay is WAAAY too happy to be working at a Starbucks, especially if she's getting off by serving her customers "Blonde Piss Roast" coffee. |
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Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.
- Mark Twain |
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msmadz
Honor Roll 8+ years on CIH Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: New York Status: Offline Points: 9952 |
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^ That line cracked me up "boil my pee"!
Welcome, Cat Box and Brad!
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The artist formerly known as Madawee
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insanity213
Ad Exec Joined: 16 Mar 2011 Location: Texas Status: Offline Points: 7806 |
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^^ That and "stoned to the gills" That one especially is great because she does look pretty baked in the video's stillshot.
Welcome Cat Box |
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msmadz
Honor Roll 8+ years on CIH Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: New York Status: Offline Points: 9952 |
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OK, I'm going to go out here on a politically incorrect limb but...
not so sure she's stoned to the gills - she kinda looks more like:
A few sandwiches short of a picnic.
The light's on but nobody's home.
The elevator didn't make it to the top floor.
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The artist formerly known as Madawee
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insanity213
Ad Exec Joined: 16 Mar 2011 Location: Texas Status: Offline Points: 7806 |
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^^
A few donuts short of a dozen. |
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Snesgamer
Junior Executive Joined: 16 Oct 2008 Location: Aptos, CA Status: Offline Points: 3166 |
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I generally try not to judge by appearances, but my God - they sure went out of their way to find the most androgynous person they could find, didn't they?
100% guaranteed lesbo, is all I have to say. |
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msmadz
Honor Roll 8+ years on CIH Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: New York Status: Offline Points: 9952 |
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You have to wonder... is it Lindsey as in Lindsey Lohan or Lindsey as in Lindsey Buckingham?
I bet "Lindsey" has a sibling named "Pat."
I still say:
the cheese fell off the cracker.
Lives out where the buses don't run
A few fries short of a Happy meal...
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The artist formerly known as Madawee
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EMCEE
Junior Executive Joined: 07 Feb 2010 Location: IL Status: Offline Points: 2731 |
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A few grounds short of a good cup of coffee. One stop short of a bus ride.One stroke short of an orgasm.
Someone's taken her marbles away.
Some mice have gotten into her grain stores.
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Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.
- Mark Twain |
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insanity213
Ad Exec Joined: 16 Mar 2011 Location: Texas Status: Offline Points: 7806 |
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She has signs by each ear saying "Space for Rent."
She fell out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way down. For all we know though she may have the mind of a mousetrap .. but if she does then she ought to let some of those mice go. |
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PaWolf
Revolutionary Hoary Ol' Chestnut... doncha know.... Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: GreatWhiteNorth Status: Offline Points: 40769 |
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Thanks tons - now I have a scalded uretha after expelling 'boiling pee' (my bladder reacts to suggestion now and then - heated up the ol'juices on it's own and just about cooked me from the inside, not unlike an Oscar Meyer hot dog in a microwave, doncha know...).
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X <sig.nature>
"What we do for ourselves dies with us, What we do for others is and remains immortal." - Albert Pike |
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EMCEE
Junior Executive Joined: 07 Feb 2010 Location: IL Status: Offline Points: 2731 |
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You could stand behind the counter as a "Blonde Piss Roast" dispenser at Starbucks! You are a Piss Roast Percolator!
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Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.
- Mark Twain |
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strifeknot
Junior Executive Joined: 12 Jul 2012 Location: PA Status: Offline Points: 306 |
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Roasts like this are for wusses. You might as well just drink a hot glass of water.
There's nothing special about Starbucks traditional roast, but at least it's not piss water. |
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Ad nauseous
Revolutionary Joined: 15 Apr 2008 Location: Connecticut Status: Offline Points: 23601 |
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OMG is she serious? Who is that interested in coffee? WTF?
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One good thing about TV-you could always turn it off
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JasperGretsch
Junior Executive Joined: 19 Jan 2010 Location: Massachusetts Status: Offline Points: 560 |
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They have another commercial with a guy talking about his mother "My son made me this coffee, it's delicious!"
Now, I have no problem if you're gay, but I had an observation: The guy in that commercial sounds like he could be, and the girl in the above commercial looks like she could be. Is it possible that Starbucks is pushing subconscious pro gay/lesbian support? Not that there's anything wrong with that...
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Thor
Revolutionary Joined: 16 Apr 2008 Location: Rockaway, NJ Status: Offline Points: 63906 |
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I guess you'd then have to ask the question "Are all the companies that never have any gays/lesbians in their commercials, pushing subconscious pro-straight support?".
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Hawkeye721
Newbie Joined: 07 Jan 2013 Location: U.S.A Status: Offline Points: 8 |
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Why is she sad when other people dont like it anyway? Its not like she invented cofee.
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